Most days in my office there is a discussion about family. Family that is loved. Family that is not. Family that has done harm. Family that has died or is missing. There is much pain surrounding family. Often I talk about “chosen family”. These are the people in our lives that matter who are not related by blood. These are the people that would do anything for you and you would do anything for them.
Recently I stumbled across a song by Elton John & Rina Sawayama which captures, very eloquently, the concept of chosen family. I encourage you to listen and reflect on the lyrics. Who in your life is your chosen family?
Chosen Family
(by Elton John & Rina Sawayama)
Where do I belong?
Tell me your story and I’ll tell you mine
I’m all ears, take your time, we got all night
Show me the rivers crossed, the mountains scaled
Show me who made you walk all the way here
Settle down, put your bags down
(Ooh) You’re alright now
We don’t need to be related to relate
We don’t need to share genes or a surname
You are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
So what if we don’t look the same?
We been going through the same thing
Yeah, you are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
Hand me a pen and I’ll rewrite the pain
When you’re ready, we’ll turn the page together
Open a bottle, it’s time we celebrate
Who you were, who you are
We’re one and the same, yeah, yeah
We don’t need to be related to relate
We don’t need to share genes or a surname
You are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
So what if we don’t look the same?
We been going through the same thing
Yeah, you are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
I, I chose you
You chose me
I chose
(Chosen family)
I chose you
You chose me
We’re alright now
We don’t need to be related to relate
We don’t need to share genes or a surname
You are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
So what if we don’t look the same?
We been going through the same thing
Yeah, you are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
We don’t need to be related to relate
We don’t need to share genes or a surname
You are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
So what if we don’t look the same?
We been going through the same thing
Yeah, you are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
We don’t need to be related to relate
We don’t need to share genes or a surname
You are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
So what if we don’t look the same?
We been going through the same thing
Yeah, you are, you are
My chosen, chosen family
If you need help to work through your family challenges I encourage you to explore the Psychotherapy and Counselling Services I offer. Reach out and book an appointment, and together we will identify your chosen family.
