Consent is important. Do you ask for consent before giving someone a hug, before sharing personal information, or before sexual activity? As adults we should all know and be aware of when consent is necessary, but do your children (of all ages) know and understand what consent means?
A blog about consent would not be complete without a brief discussion about what the lack of consent means. If you are forced or coerced into doing something that does not mean you consent. If you are manipulated that is not consent. If there is a power imbalance that does not allow for you to freely disagree that is not consent. You cannot consent to certain things if you are of a particular age. If you are incapacitated, you cannot consent.
Consent is necessary when physical touch or sexual activity is involved. Consent also pertains to the sharing of information, entering someone’s space, or using someone’s belongings. More below…
Consent is Necessary in the Following Situations
- Physical touch of any kind — including hugs, kisses, pats on the back, etc. Young children may not know that they can refuse a hug. Children may not know that they should ask before touching others, or they may forget. We all know the story about the kid who hugs another child on the playground and then gets slugged because the other child doesn’t want to be hugged. Education around consent starts early.
- Sexual activities – all people involved need to clearly consent to activities before they start. Explaining consent to teenagers in this area is very important. A simple yes may not be enough. Consent cannot be coerced. All parties need to aware of the risks. Consent needs to be enthusiastic and continuous. Everyone needs to know that they can change their mind at any time. Consenting to sexual activity needs to be clear, which means silence is not consent.
- Personal information — Sharing information, including anything that might be used on social media, like photos or videos, requires consent. Sharing private conversations or information also requires permission.
- Entering someone’s space – consent is required before you enter a person’s private space like an office.
- Using someone’s belongings – ask before you borrow or use someone else’s stuff.
Other areas that require consent include but are not limited to medical procedures, participation in research, and academic or professional projects.
When in doubt, ask for consent.
Listening. Guiding. Caring.
