We are fast approaching the end of the year. Often people make resolutions on New Year’s eve. Have you taken the time to look back over your year to decide if you lived 2016 the way you wanted? Did the things that you thought were important? Were grateful for the small moments? Told someone you loved them? Gave back to your community? Tried something new or wished you had? Do you have regrets?
Regrets are part of life. Regrets you can’t live with are problematic. They can lead to guilt and in extreme cases shame. How do you deal with these intense feelings? And who do you talk to when it gets to be too much? How do you re-frame your thoughts? How do you gain another perspective? A healthier perspective where you can forgive yourself for mistakes made, opportunities not taken and begin to feel lighter and better about the future.
CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is a classic counselling technique which helps individuals address everything from depression and anxiety to regrets and more. As part of CBT you learn to identify thinking which causes distress. The technical term is a cognitive distortion, but easier to remember is a wonky thought. We all have these thoughts, but they can become louder and more frequent when stressed or anxious. Typical thoughts might include should statements, discounting the positive, catastrophizing and mind reading.
A book which helps with negative thinking is Mind Over Mood by Greenberger and Padesky. Another option is an app called Mood Tools which allows the user to challenge their thoughts on their smart phone. Learning to re-frame your thoughts reduces negative feelings. If you need help working through your regrets or just need someone to talk to, call Annette Poechman at 905-520-5859 or click here. Listening. Guiding, Caring.
