Self-soothing is a term often used in a therapist’s office. Most people are unsure what the term self-soothing means and why skills in this area are needed. Self-soothing is a necessary coping skill in today’s stressful world. Self-soothing is an individual’s ability to calm themselves before, during or after a stressful event and reduces the impact of a situation and the related emotions. It also allows individuals to more easily and quickly access thoughtful responses to stressful events and carry on with their life. If you can learn to self-soothe you can better manage your emotions and your life. Some key strategies for self-soothing:
- Breathing – Focus on the breath and getting out of your head into your body is a great strategy to calm yourself. Paying attention, on purpose to the sensation of the breath can calm and relax the mind.
- PMR – Progressive Muscle Relaxation is purposely contracting and relaxing individual muscles in the body. Typically starting at the feet and working upwards an individual contracts and slowly relaxes muscles. This also promotes getting out of your head and into your body.
- Meditating – Meditating is not easy. If you have never meditated before start with a guided meditation. A useful app that clients have recommended is HeadSpace. Download it onto your phone or tablet. The duration of the meditation is short. Start slowly. Again this is great for getting out of the brain and into the body. Remember to be kind to yourself. Learning how to meditate is like exercising a muscle at the gym. The more you use it the easier it becomes.
- Music – Listening to calming music can help change your focus. Create a playlist of songs that you can easily and quickly turn to when you need to self-soothe.
- Exercise/Walking/Yoga – Regular exercise is known to help manage stress. Gentle exercise can help calm you. When you feel overwhelmed take some time out of your day to walk. Getting out of the situation that is causing the upset is key. Movement can help soothe.
- Connecting with friends and family – Talking to the supportive people in your life is another option. Supportive is the key. Reach out to others in your life in moments of distress.
- Nature – When feeling overwhelmed take a moment to listen to the birds, smell the flowers, feel the wind on your face or walk in the woods. We often spend too much time inside and when distressed nature can get us out of our heads and into the moment.
- Creative outlets – Find something to do that is going to take you out of your head and into the moment. Create something new. Try a new hobby. Participating is the key.
- Journaling – Writing about what is happening can help. Getting the thoughts that are whirling around in your brain on paper can bring relief.
- Volunteering – Switching your focus to helping others can get you out of your head and into the moment resulting in a feeling of calm.
Most important of all is try to treat yourself with compassion. Talking kindly to yourself and reminding yourself that you can get through a situation goes a long way towards reducing upset. If you would like to talk to Annette about issues that are causing you distress please feel to contact her by clicking here or book into her schedule by clicking on the link at the top of the page. Listening. Guiding. Caring.
